TOP 100 funniest one-liners on the internet!

TOP 10:

01. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
02. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
03. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
04. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
05. Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
06. We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
07. Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
08. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
09. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
10. If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

Funny? And the rest...
Funny and thoughtful.